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Read time: 3 minutes
Good afternoon, 66.1ers.
Been thinking about the role of stress and anxiety in chronic disease lately. Not entirely sure what to make of it, to be perfectly honest. There are some people who seem to tolerate stress with no issue. Then there are others who are so sensitive to it that any bit of stress seems to throw them off the path.
One question to start with is, “What does your family history look like?” I exchanged messages with a woman who’s a deep tech inventor, her father was a Green Beret in Vietnam, his father was a paratrooper in World War II. Her suspicion is that she has a little extra something (“cytochrome Y” or something like that) in her genes that allows her to handle high-stress situations without getting stressed out. Kinda cool. But what about the rest of us? Are we screwed?
I like to think not. Nature vs. nurture. The case above is an example of a generous gift from “nature”. My genetics aren’t quite that bulletproof. My family tree has heart attacks starting as early as 38, lots of other chronic disease stuff in 50s and 60s. So I’m taking notes from people who have “outperformed” their genetics. A mentor who has outlived his grandfather by 20 years and just passed his father. His explanation? “I forgot how to spell stress”.
Makes me think there are a lot of us who could benefit from deleting this word from our memories. And maybe the associated “A” word that comes along with it. Not following? A for Anxiety. Friends and clients telling me, “I’m an anxious person.” Like it can’t ever change. Just who they are and always will be. Do you really want to live in that trap for the next 60 years? Or might life be more fun, might you be able to help more people if, instead of sentencing yourself to a lifetime of nerves, you changed your language to say things like, “I feel anxious because ______.” and then do something to change the circumstances? Do you really think you were put on this earth to be a self-absorbed bundle of nerves?
But…how to get out of this anxious spiral, where anxiety begets anxiety?
What you need to do (warning: easier said than done!) is to “lose your mind and come to your senses” (Dan Millman, Way of the Peaceful Warrior). BUT: you don’t get to use your favorite tool (your mind) to do it. Thinking too much got you here. Why would thinking even more get you out of here? More succinctly, in the words of Chris Williamson, “You can’t think your way out of an overthinking problem.” Instead, you’ve got to change your body, change states. Your mind will follow. There’s a few tried-and-true ways to go about this:
Exercise
This is my #1 go-to to shake myself from a slump. I prefer running. Trail running if it’s an option. I remember hearing something on a podcast about how your brain gets revved up like there’s a tiger lurking in the shadows when you’re anxious. Unfortunately for modern humans, our brains haven’t evolved to distinguish between a tiger in the shadows and a “troll” on social media. So, when we read 74 negative comments on Instagram while we get up and running (if you know you know) after that first cup of coffee in the morning, our brain is as activated as if there were a tiger in the bushes. Obviously, the best cure for this is to delete Instagram and never reinstall it. The second-best cure is to do what you’d do if there were a tiger: physically move away from it. In other words, get off Instagram and move your body to signal to your brain that you’re going away from danger. Your mind will calm down.Good people
I’ve talked before about how humans aren’t meant to be alone. Back in the day, if there was a tiger and you were alone, you weren’t long for this world. Naturally, your brain would be triggering all sorts of feelings of anxiety. These are meant to propel you back toward your tribe, so you don’t get eaten. They’re not a personality defect. They’re just a signal to you that something is off. Get with your people. Add value to their lives however you can. If they’re busy, let them be. Sometimes, the most helpful thing you can do is to say, “I know you’ve got a full plate. Go and make it happen, let me know how I can help, I’ll be here when the dust settles.” Then go hang out with someone else. No worries. If they’ve got family stuff going on, you’re not their priority. If they’re having a hard time paying the bills, you’re not their priority. Etc. Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs. And, if it happens a few times that you’re giving a bunch more than you’re getting from the relationship, maybe it’s time to move on. No sweat.Sleep
If you don’t sleep, your immune system essentially stops showing up for work, your brain goes wild, and you’re probably not a very nice person. I’m not, anyway. Exercise during the day, spend some time outside, put your phone down an hour before bed, and let your body rest!
Or, in short, got an anxiety problem?
Find yourself overthinking everything?
Have fun out there.
Marcus
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